It's not hard to believe in this day and age that Bullies are amongst us... schools, work and out on the streets. But, I thought the days of teasing about wearing glasses or having braces were over?? Apparently not!
I have recently found out that for the last 2 years (yep, that's right, 2 years!) my 8 year old son has been the victim of bullying. Now, this is not just on the level of calling him "four eyes", but has grown to hitting, kicking, headlocks and comments like; "I am going to take your sister home and tie her up, drag her upstairs and kill her"... oh, and the others... "I'm gonna kill you", "I am going to bring a gun to school and kill your father". Comforting huh?
The story came through his friend, while talking to his mom. Then, eventually got over to our family. We found out that most recently the bully was challenging my son to a fight. Constantly. Each time they entered the bathroom after recess, the bully went to work on him... trying to get him to fight. What followed the nasty comments was a whole slue of physical choices; punching, slapping, head locks, kicking, etc... In addition, my son's best friend was stepping in, taking some of the hits to "protect" him!! Don't get me wrong. My son is an average 8 year old boy with the the "little devil" sticker to prove it. But, this is too far.
Upon bringing it to the principal, the resolution was that the boys "just liked drama", that none of them "meant to hurt the other" (even though it was only happening in one direction??) They, the principal and parent of the bully confirmed the hitting... but the solution to the problem was simply removing bathroom privileges (i.e. all at the same time). As you can imagine, I disagreed with this, but nothing was changed. In fact, I was told that I was being "extreme" by the principal.
When we reviewed the bullying policy at the same meeting, we asked why it was not followed, we received no response. Not sure what the purpose of having a policy (via the state of Maine) is, if you don't follow it. Additionally, he would not commit to putting the boys in a separate class next year or even keeping them apart this year.
Next day at school, after the parent/principal meeting, another incident. When I asked the principal about it, he said the boys were just playing dodge ball (okay, first, why were THESE boys allowed to play dodge ball, when there is a known issue between them??). Nothing has been done about it since.
We have brought this to the Superintendents office and are hoping for help for this bully (who is only 8!) and to have a stronger resolution to the problem. Keep your fingers crossed!!!
Hope you get some action! Good luck! Hugs to you all!
ReplyDeleteI am furiously angry right now!!!! The way the school is handling this is completely wrong! Both my daughters have been bullied in one way or another and when I contacted the school they took immediate action! Bullying is NOT to be taken lightly! I would not only contact the super intendent, but I would contact the police with threats like that!
ReplyDeleteI am mortified that the school took this so lightly! Trust your instincts on this and protect your child!
Your instinct is the right one. If this bully is not stopped now what will he become when he is a teenager. Your son deserves to go to school everyday -- ready to learn and play and not in environment where he is in fear, is intimidated or threatened.
ReplyDeleteWhy haven't you all called the police and had the bully charged with assault? My biggest regret when my daughter was bullied, and some kid kicked the bathroom stall door in on her, clipping her in the head, was not calling the police. My daughter and the bully were both only 8 years old. I went to the school and it was all underplayed. My daughter was miserable that whole school year and I never realized how serious the situation was because I trusted the school.
ReplyDeleteNow, after working as a Juvenile Probation/Parole Officer in the City of Richmond, Virginia, for several years, I realize how serious it actually was back then. I would suggest having the bully criminally charged, then explain to the school that you will drag them through civil court, go the media, etc. because they are responsible for your child from the portal to post (your door to theirs), unless you have already done this. Be aggressive, be crazy aggressive! You child needs to know that you all will do whatever it takes to ensure his or her safety. He or she is looking to his parents for protection.